By executive order, I hereby instruct my newly appointed Attorney General, Catherine Kalmenson, to disband the organization now known as the Internal Revenue Service with total prejudice and malice.
- I hereby immediately dissolve the federal agency known as The Internal Revenue Service.
- By executive order, I hereby establish a new American Army, to function separately from our existing military.
- Former IRS employees will man this Army.
- Service in this new Army will be mandatory.
- Failure by ex-IRS agents and employees to serve in said military will be punishable by forfeiture of all rights as American citizens.
- Compensation in this new military will be based on the former IRS’ repayment of all monies squandered by said agents during the course of their governmental service.
- All liens enacted by the IRS – on any and all personal property earned by any and all citizens during any form of legal commerce – is hereby removed and forgiven.
- Personal Income Tax would become a National Consumption Tax levied on all goods and services at point of purchase.
After these doctrines, established by my imperial order, have been enforced, I will tender my resignation upon the holding of a new national election.
It was good being KING – don’t you think?